Life in 3P

A letter to the drunken man on the NJ transit train

To the man sitting one seat over and back from me on the 1:42 train from Penn Station to New Brunswick:

Sir, I am sure you thought it was a good idea to have those last four shots of tequila at the bar before you got on the train. You, and every passenger in the train car quickly discovered your mistake. The first time you vomited down the front of your shirt and onto the floor, I had some sympathy. As you continued to vomit for the next hour without ever attempting to clean yourself up or escape to the lavatory, my sympathy entirely vanished. Are you aware that you filled the car with the odor of alcohol and sour stomach acid? Are you aware that it was so overpowering I spent the majority of the ride breathing through a scarf to keep from gagging? Do you understand that for an entire 45 minutes it took all of my mental energy to keep this thought out of my head: "The fact that I am smelling this man's vomit means that I am inhaling small particles of said vomit."

Frankly, the amount you choose to drink is your business, but if you cannot hold your liquor, you should not get on a packed train where people cannot escape your vile, vomit-covered person.

Sincerely,
Camille J Thompson

posted by Camille @ 11:59 AM